‘Going golfing’ top excuse used by cheating hubbies

AS the world’s top golfers (including serial adulterers Tiger Woods and Colin Montgomerie) gather at St Andrews for the 2010 British Open Golf Championship, a married dating website has found that “going Golfing” is one of the most common excuses used by British husbands to obscure their affairs.
IllicitEncounters.com, which provides a platform for married people to find extra-marital lovers, surveyed 1456 of its male members on the excuses they use to cover up their infidelity. Although traditional excuses like “working late” and “dinner with a friend” topped the list, “going golfing” sneaked in to third place, with 14% of the site’s male membership claiming they had at one time used a game of golf to cover up an illicit liaison.
Partners of gym fanatics should also be wary; “going to the gym” was the fourth most common excuse used by both men and women.

A killer waiting to strike

MOTORISTS in Scotland are calling for immediate action as the pothole crisis on Britain’s roads reaches breaking point with drivers being forced off the road by the dangerous craters.
In a new report by leading automotive service brand, Autoglass®, which questioned 3,000 drivers, exactly half (50%) said they’ve had either an accident or near miss while driving as a result of the horrifying road conditions and a quarter of motorists (25%) admit that someone they know has also been in the same situation.
Local councils in Scotland have a responsibility to display a temporary road sign when road conditions are poor, but more than nine out of ten (92%) drivers have never seen such a notice. When asked what measures they would like to see in place to protect them from pothole danger, four in ten (45%) would welcome a clear temporary road sign and over half (52%) think fluorescent markings around bad potholes would serve as a safe warning to traffic.
The survey also reveals that on an average journey motorists in Scotland encounter a staggering 14 potholes, with over a quarter (28%) coming across up to 20. Two thirds (62%) admit they spend more time watching out for ruts than keeping their eyes on the road ahead.
Potholes are costing Britain’s motorists around £3.7 billion4 in annual vehicle repairs with 64% of those polled having suffered because of the treacherous trenches. Almost half (46%) have experienced suspension problems, almost half (48%) have had a burst tyre, almost a fifth (17%) of drivers have had their windscreens chipped from the hole kicking up stones and a further 17% have had their paintwork damaged. An average spend of £208 per motorist is being shelled out on car repairs in Scotland as a result of the pothole crisis according to those questioned.
Do you know of any dangerous potholes on Borders roads? Let us know!

Taking a sickie to cheer on England?

THE latest piece of useless research to come by email states that workers in Scotland are least likely to pull a sickie during the World Cup - no surprise there then!
The survey, carried out by Continental Tyres, reckons one in five Scottish workers will pull a sickie this summer as England attempt to lift the World Cup in South Africa - but I think they are more likely to go to work to get away from the hype!
Anyway, bosses beware - during the World Cup a cheeky one in six workers will lie and say their car won’t start, have a sudden bout of food poisoning or simply feel dizzy. One in 20 will even blame a death in the family for keeping them off work.
The survey also reckons that a quarter of women won’t watch the World Cup because David Beckham isn’t playing.

Launch of a new era

NOW a Tory-Lib Dem deal has been agreed, Gordon Brown has resigned as Prime Minister and David Cameron has moved into No 10, the media is full of news and analysis of what this will mean for Britain over the coming months and years ... presuming the coalition doesn’t break down.
But more importantly, people here want to know what will it mean for Scotland and the Borders.
Because while it appears that the electorate was ready for change, the country was not quite ready to fully endorse the Tories. However, the reality is that Labour didn’t cut it when it counted, the SNP was never going to make much of a dent nationally, and realistically, the Lib Dems probably didn’t expect to form the next government on their own. So perhaps this compromise offers some balance and reason.
Everyone knows it’s not going to be easy, particularly if Scottish Borders Council leader David Parker is right about more cuts being on the way as the government makes a start on reducing the country’s debt, with £6billion expected to be clawed back across the UK in the current financial year.
However, Michael Moore is an experienced politician who works hard for his constituents and he now has a serious voice in government.
Let’s ensure he makes the most of his position and makes sure our concerns are heard.

BGH report raises questions

Borderers will no doubt be shocked at the damning report on infection control compiled by the Health Environment Inspectorate following a visit to the Borders General Hospital earlier this year.
Among the points raised by the inspectors were that there was no consideration of risk for patients, staff and visitors in Ward 8 and there was a consistent lack of attention to cleaning floor edgings and corners.
Although the inspectors reported that the overall perception of cleanliness in the hospital was good, bosses were told to improve cleaning methods.
A high level of cleanliness in a hospital should be a given, no excuses. However, ensuring a public hospital maintains that, day in, day out, is a massive undertaking for cleaning and nursing staff, particularly if vacancies are not being filled because of budget contraints.
So, perhaps some of the questions that need to be asked are: Does the BGH employ enough staff to carry out the necessary work? Are nurses given the training and support they need to ensure guidelines are followed? It would seem not.
Senior ward staff were reported to have said they are not supported by top hospital staff. BGH managers have put a comprehensive action plan in place to ensure that the recommendations in the report are acted on immediately, but any improvements are likely to suffer if staffing levels are too low to realistically sustain them.
As managers, they have a duty of care for staff as well as patients, and it is not difficult to see that if you get the first one right, the second will follow.

Snake among sewerage system finds

A LIVE snake, badger and a dead cow were among the bizarre things found in Scotland’s sewer network in the past year, water chiefs have said.
Scottish Water staff have also found a platoon of toy soldiers, a live frog and a goldfish clogging the pipes.
The firm spends £6m a year clearing system blockages and urged people to think about what they flush away.
Many items also enter the system by falling into drains or manholes found in fields and roads.
A worker at the Dunfermline waste water treatment works was stunned to see a Mexican desert kingsnake curled beneath a metal grid boardwalk he was strolling along.
He contacted the Scottish SPCA, who collected the non-venomous constrictor snake and took it away.
A live badger found in a pumping station well at Drongan in Ayrshire also made a full recovery after it was rescued by the SSPCA.
A goldfish named Pooh, recovered in East Kilbride, and a frog found in a pump in Dornoch, Highlands, were none the worse for their time inside the sewer system.
However, a sheep found in a manhole chamber and a cow recovered from a storm tank were not so lucky.

Soldiering on in the danger zone

FOR many local families, last week was a week to be dreaded.
One which saw the start of the major deployment of soldiers from the Borders’ own infantry regiment to the most dangerous place in the world – Afghanistan’s Helmand Province.
During the next few weeks a total of 400 troops of the Royal Scots Borderers will fly out to the war zone where just last week six British soldiers lost their lives in one of the grimmest periods for our army since being first sent to Afghanistan in 2001.
Nearly a decade on and with another bloody conflict having been fought in Iraq at the same time, it is becoming almost a tragic weekly occurrence to hear of more deaths of British soldiers in combat.
A decade ago few in the Borders would have known where Helmand was, yet now it is a name seared into our national consciousness. And rightly so. Because whether you agree or not about British forces being in Afghanistan, the men and women sent to war by our government are there on our behalf, doing a job most of us would run a mile from if asked.
Helmand is the largest of Afghanistan’s 34 provinces. Mainly desert, it is the world’s largest opium-producing region and one which the Taliban has made a key battleground.
The next six months will be an anxious period for those Borders families with loved ones serving with the battalion. As they depart, we wish them well, knowing they will uphold the finest traditions of the Scottish infantry – professionalism, courage, compassion and steadfastness.
And we will long for the day, which seems so far off today, when we see them return home to their proud Borderland.

Most unfortunate names revealed

IMAGINE growing up as Annette Curtain, Tim Burr, Justin Case, Barb Dwyer or Stan Still.
It sounds like a bad joke, but a study has revealed that there really are unfortunate people with those names in the UK.
Joining them on the list are Terry Bull, Paige Turner, Mary Christmas and Anna Sasin.
And just imagine having to introduce yourself to a crowd as Doug Hole or Hazel Nutt.
The names were uncovered by researchers from parenting group TheBabyWebsite.com after trawling through online telephone records.
Retired airman Stan Still, 76, from Cirencester, Gloucestershire, said his name had been "a blooming millstone around my neck my entire life". But 51-year-old Rose Bush, from Coventry, West Midlands, said she loved her name.
Other unfortunate names uncovered include Pearl Button, Jo King, Barry Cade, Carrie Oakey and Priti Manek.
Researchers also scoured phone records in the US and found some unlikely names there too including San Franciso dentist Les Plack!

Flying Toblerones!

REPORTS of “flying Toblerones” and objects travelling at 1,100 mph across the Scottish sky have been released by the Ministry of Defence.
The files detail how unidentified objects have been witnessed flying over a range of locations across Scotland.
Among them were one from a senior air traffic controller at Prestwick Airport who reported seeing a fast-moving UFO on the airport radar.
While four fishermen spotted a flat, shiny object hovering off the coast.
The Scottish accounts are among the thousands of reports made of close encounters with UFOs across the UK which have been released in a joint project between the MoD and the National Archives.
Also included in the previously top secret files is the testimony of a West Lothian electrician who spotted a “Toblerone-shaped” UFO hovering over a field.
Another document describes a request submitted to former Prime Minister Tony Blair from a councillor for an inquiry into 600 alleged sightings in the so-called Bonnybridge Triangle, near Falkirk.

Scottish motorists most likely to hit animals

NEW research into the types of crashes motorists have has shown people in Scotland are the most likely in the UK to hit an animal.
Although rear end bumps are by far the most common road accidents, car insurance specialist elephant.co.uk. looked into the more unusual types of incidents, in particular where they happen.
elephant.co.uk looked at data from over 1.3 million claims over five years and found the top five postcode areas for accidents involving animals were all in Scotland.
Some of the unusual claims were more of a surprise and include incidents of motorists hitting badgers, swans, horses, cows and even monkeys. One policyholder even struck a rabbit which despite its small size, wrote off the car!
The Galashiels area was the fourth worst in the UK for cars hitting trees while Berwick was the fourth worst for hitting walls!

The voice of rugby Bill McLaren

EVEN if you are not a rugby fan you loved Bill McLaren who sadly died in his home town of Hawick earlier this week at the age of 86.
Scotland has lost 'the voice of rugby' and we will all miss the pearls of wisdom which made his commentaries legendary.
No-one loved his sport more. His knowledge was encyclopaedic, his attention to detail was extraordinary and his ability to recall facts and figures unrivalled.
The world of sport and broadcastling has lost a true legend.

Snow angels!

PROOF this week, if it were needed, that faced with adversity people rise to the challenge - and succeed.
Proof also that community spirit is alive and well in Berwickshire and the Borders, whether it is helping to keep elderly neighbours fed and warm; collecting prescriptions for those unable to get out or banding together to clear roads where the gritters feared to venture.
The big freeze has brought out the best in some of the good hearted people around the district and Scottish Borders workermn, NHS Borders staff and many nothjers have gone beyond the call of duty. Well done to all of you.
Unfortunately, one victim of the weather was the Berwickshire News!
For the first time in living memory, the paper - along with a number of others including our sister titles the Berwickshire Advertiser and Southern Reporter - printed at Sunderland did not hit the shelves last Thursday.
The vans bringing the papers north were stopped south of Berwick in the early hours of last Thursday morning and a combination of roads closed due to snow and vehicles being stuck meant the distribution company which delivers the titles was unable to get them here.
Apologies to all readers - we hope that picking up the paper a day later did not spoil your enjoyment.